I came across this quote, by L.R Knost on parenting
"It's our job to raise children who will make the world a little less cruel and heartless"
We may never become parents or caregivers for a child. Even if we do, we will act to obstruct certain attitudes and actions and facilitate others in more children than we could ever get to father or mother.
We are the social system that wraps around the infant from birth and onward. It is expressed in the norms and beliefs implicit and explicit in the behavior of primary caregivers and others in the gradually, but exponentially, sprawling growth of the interconnected social networks the maturing individual inhabits.
The ephemeral system of meanings shared by people in a society is the only context and environment where children learn the possibilities and consequences of behavior.
It is where we all have the beliefs we grow into continually modified throughout our lives.
But it is a bidirectional modification.
Right now, right here, in this world, I can make the social environment a little bit more favorable and less hostile to acts I promote; minimize the social costs and maximize the incentives, to speak behavioral economics, to the habits of mind and action I want to survive and thrive in a sort of natural selection of behaviors and memes.
I take active part in this whether I want to or not; I just want to be aware and selective when I go about promoting the survival and proliferation of ideas and values, and of behaviors that reflects these and make then meaningful.
You cannot opt out; but you can harness the potential.
In most cases, there will not be any linear and clear connection between what I do and the behavior of someone else; it is not something you can hope to ever be recognized for.
It is like parenting. If you ever do get a clearly communicated understanding and appreciation from your kids for your good intentions, perhaps when the methods, of how you raised your kids, it is rarely something safe to place your bet on or hold your breath waiting for.
In part, that is because there are many people affecting an outcome that in itself is a moving target; literally is always a piece of art that is never finished and increasingly becoming its' own creator.
As one kid put it:
"It's one of 'em leap of faith things"
It is.
It is not done for praise, and if there ever is a Thank You note, it is not gonna be a dollar bill.
But, on the other hand, you will be your own boss. Unless maybe in some spiritual sense, there won't be anyone holding you accountable on this side of eternity.
Personally, it is my choice not to hide behind, or be discouraged by, that.
I see the impact as significant enough to motivate harnessing it.
In practice it means that I in all instances of interaction, in the ways I can conceive, to the best of my ability:
walk the talk
and
work to pave that path;
meaning making walking that talk less difficult for anyone who choose to do so.
If that is reflecting self-importance, then it is a sense of importance I see as sharing with everyone else.